on consistency & self discipline.

hastily tapped out in my phone notes while en route from Denver to Raleigh last week - 

I'll never understand why I stop doing things that I like.

Working out. Eating healthfully. Writing on this blog. 

Human nature seems to dictate this weird need to depart from routines and activities and tasks, even if those things are beloved to us. Do we need a break from the monotony? Do we secretly need to rebel? Are we all just that wishy washy? 

Maybe it's just me. But really, drawing from conversations with friends, I'm quite sure that it is not just me. Many of us seem to have to struggle inwardly against ourselves to make sure we are doing - consistently - the things that we love. 

I know people who don't seem to struggle in this way. And a character trait that I observe in them, alongside this faithful, relentless, and unfailing consistency? Self discipline. 

A long time ago, in what was probably 2006 or 2007, there was this feature you were able to install on Facebook that allowed individuals to write anonymous messages to you, that only you could view. I'll never forget one of the messages I got one night (in fact, it's the only message from that feature I even remember at all). It read, 

"I wish you weren't such a flake." 

Even now, I am not sure who of my friends wrote that message to me, though I have an idea or two that would certainly make sense*. At that time in my life, I will admit that I was flaky. I was flighty and anxious and always trying to fit in and please people and be viewed as fun. And now, I can recognize that life - and living a happy one at that - is not about pleasing everyone with what a lively and vivacious person you are, with how many stories you have to tell, with how new and exciting your life is - and remains - day after day. Your real friends and family will love you, even when you're dull, even when you don't know what to say, even when you're in a dark place. 

I wish I would have known that back then, so that I could have been the kind of friend to whomever wrote that message, that I try to emulate now. I wish I would have known how to look deep inside myself and recognize all that I truly love and hold dear. And I wish I would have had the courage then, to be true to myself. I wish I would have had more self discipline, to stick beside plans, to stick beside my friends, to stick beside myself. 

And now, I hope and pray for the kind of self discipline that yields consistency. Consistency with exercise, healthful eating, sharing by way of this blog, connecting with dear friends. 

I hope and pray for that magical, unyielding consistency. 

*If you wrote that message to me, and you are reading this, please know that I am truly sorry that I was not there for you. I sincerely wish I would have been. 

let's carve a pumpkin.

On a chilly weekend in late October, Carina had a pumpkin carving party. We all gathered in her back yard on a blanket, pumpkins in hand, carving tools at the ready, & created some of the most festive jack-o'-lanterns you ever did see. We ate soup, decorated cookies, chatted around a bonfire, & just generally enjoyed each other's company. And I know that this is one of the memories from being in grad school that I will hold close to me for years to come. 

the sunday currently, volume 107.

breakfast post-race at the scullery with rebekah

Good Sunday morning to ya! Today I have quite a lot to check off on my to-do list, and I am feeling ready to get all of that accomplished! Also, later on I get to pick Justin up from the airport! I can't wait! I have had a great weekend full of homemade curry, spending the night with a friend, and running in a 5k. I'm hoping to carry over this joy into the week, working hard on school and checking everything off my future to-do lists. Here we go!

On this Sunday, I am currently...

reading for school this week. I'm really trying to get back on track with everything and get into a better study schedule. 

writing a lot in my planner lately. It's making me feel a lot better. I feel like I go through phases with my planner, and I'm really happy to be in an "on" one right now.

listening to my Fall 2015 playlist, which I talked about in my TSC post from two weeks ago and will be posting here on siddathornton this Wednesday, since it is the Fall Equinox, and we will finally be officially in the Autumn season!

thinking that I am ready for Justin to get home! He has been in Kansas on a golf tournament since this past Wednesday, and I'm tired of holding down the fort over here. I can't wait to see him!

smelling like Brown Sugar and Fig from Bath and Body Works and Burberry Brit lately has made me so very happy. I'm so glad that I discovered that my favorite scent was back on B&BWorks' website, and that my parents got me a wonderful Burberry Brit gift set for my birthday. Yay for signature scents!

wishing I was better at adulting. I hate staying home by myself while Justin is out of town. Luckily, I have some wonderful friends who have let me sleep over at their houses in the past few days. 

hoping I will have a productive school work week ahead. 

wearing the gel manicure that I got two weeks and one day ago... still. That is a pretty amazing fact, if you ask me. I can't believe it has lasted this long. I must be honest - I am getting a little tired of the color. I might remove it sometime this week and paint them a different color. Maybe grey? Maybe red? We'll see.

loving the fact that I changed my social media handles back to siddathornton - they were lrschristy for a while there. I know it's a bit confusing to change things like this, but lately I've realized just how special the siddathornton name is to me. It feels like a comfortable thing to come back to.

wanting to do quite a few things today: work on statistics at Coffee Shack with Danielle, dye my hair, do a little grocery shopping, and look into transferring my blog over to Word Press, as well as look into purchasing a dot com. And then, of course, pick Justin up from the airport! Busy day ahead! And I love it.

needing to run 3 miles a couple of times this week. I ran the Vidant Run, Walk, and Roll yesterday, and I am so happy. I ran the whole time, albeit quite slow, and it was very inspiring to me. I plan to keep the pace up and hopefully beat my time - 37:16 - at the 5k that Justin & I [and some of my classmates] are doing this coming up Saturday. 

feeling great. I've been working out a lot lately, and it has been a really good change for me. Now, I just need to get my eating in order. Healthy habits! Something I always have to work toward.

clicking Blackboard, my ECU email account, and other such things this week. Here's to school work!

I hope you're having a wonderful weekend! Here's to safe travels for Justin today, as well as anyone else on the road or in the air.

--
siddathornton through the years:
2012

What are you doing? Link up and share below.

so that's what i'll do.

into New Bern

"No One's Gonna Love You" by Band of Horses is playing and we are sitting in Coffee Shack reading and writing and emailing. 

I keep having that out-of-body feeling, even when I'm talking to R or D, like I'm floating above myself, watching us interacting. Sometimes this feeling happens when I start to realize how fleeting these moments really are. It's as if it's my body's way of telling me, this won't last forever, so here's what it will feel like when it's a memory.

I've always known that this wouldn't last forever. We're given two years of classes together, and then we have six months of being in the field, preparing for when we are actually part of our profession. And during those six months, we might be in the same place, but we might not. 

It's hard to imagine what life will be like after we graduate. I've grown so comfortable in my rhythm here, in the patterns of studying and talking-instead-of-studying and running races and doing projects and sitting together in class. It's become home to me, and I know it will be hard when everything shifts, like I know that it will.

All I can do is soak in the moments of the next eight months. All I can do is attend as many gatherings as I can. Participate in as many service opportunities as possible. Meet up for coffee as much as my schedule allows. 

So that's what I'll do.

--

siddathornton through the years:

2012 

inspiration: found. searching for discipline.

serendipitous photographs  

My mom and I ran into a friend while out shopping today. 

We talked about so many things, and it felt so great to reconnect, but it struck me [as it always does when this topic comes up in real life conversations] when we talked about blogging.

She shared that she herself was interested in getting into blogging.

"My blog has been paid for for a few months now," she said. "But it's blank - there's no content."

I want her to start blogging. She's witty, she's funny - she has the BEST kind of dry humor. 

And it made me think. Maybe if I want her to blog so badly, I also want me to blog just as much. And I do. I want to be here. I miss sharing. I miss connecting. 

With the rebirth of The Sunday Currently, I've felt so much joy. That means something, doesn't it? Yes, it does.

Long live blogging. Long live the written word. Long live siddathornton.

a pre-thanksgiving pop-in.

It's really a bit mind-boggling, how busy I've found myself in this first semester of OT school. It's been a wild ride, and I wouldn't trade it for anything (despite my somewhat-constant grumbling as of late - stress'll do that to ya). 

I'm sitting here in my dining room. Tahoe is asleep on the first landing of the stairs, and the blustery rain is continuing its incessant beating outside. The ham was picked up earlier today, and I have an 18-item to-do list immediately to my left, none of which includes school tasks. Our first Thanksgiving guest arrives later this evening. 

It's our first Thanksgiving to host with non-family members in attendance - though we will, thankfully, have one family member in attendance! - & to say that I'm thrilled is an understatement. I love the holidays. I love food. I love friends. I love having people over. But I'm a little bit nervous, too. Cooking for these friends that have so quickly become family is a bit intimidating. I'm not known for my cooking skills, but I'm going to put my best foot forward. And, of course, Justin will be contributing his mad kitchen skills. I just can't wait to make holiday memories with these wonderful, hilarious, sweet, awesome people.

I'm rambling, I know. But it's the only way I know how to talk/write right now. 

I just miss this space. I miss sharing. I miss blogging. 

I plan to take photos tomorrow, which will hopefully be shared in this space in a timely manner. I have plans brewing on the horizon for this blog, and it's my great hope that they come to fruition.

There's so much school work to be done, but I think a couple of days off will do my body and mind some good.

So, I guess that's all for right now. Except for the fact that I'm wearing - and rocking, if I do say so myself - red lipstick today. And later, I'm getting bangs. But I guess those are very small things in relation to everything else. So, I will leave you on that note.

Happy Thanksgiving!

on listening: sometimes, it's the best medicine.

I had a post planned for today, but things - especially blogging things - don't always go to plan, do they?

Today I woke up later than I wanted to. I straightened my hair & wore a maxi dress, & it poured down rain. I saw one of my favorite Viners around town & was too scared to approach them [thanks, Luke Wilson] [and wow... my hair was really blonde in that post]. There were coffee grounds swimming around in my iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts. In short: things weren't going as well as they could have.

But then, I got to Whole Foods & just sat down with a friend & chatted about everything. True, we were there to get a jump on our anatomy class that's coming in the fall... & really, we only cracked the book & glanced at the flash cards. But really, I think we both just needed a chat. I think she needed to get some things off her chest, & I think that I needed to listen. 

Because when you take the time to really listen to someone, you realize how very much you are not alone in this world. And what better comfort is there than that?

That's all I really have to share today. I am grateful to June Blogs, because if I hadn't committed to posting every day, today is one I would have skipped, no question. You'll be happy to know that the day has gotten considerably better: I had a DELICIOUS, healthy lunch at Whole Foods, I got afternoon coffee from Starbucks, & now I'm mapping out a plan for cleaning my house this afternoon. And later, a walk in the park & a viewing of Pretty Little Liars, season 4, on Netflix. 

See? Sometimes all you need is a chat with a friend, & to look closely at all the little things that add up into one big sum of joy.

/////

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Want to join me in blogging every day in June? The more the merrier. I even made a button to celebrate the occasion. Feel free to use it in your blog sidebar or in the body of your posts. Let's encourage one another to get back to our blogging roots. Happy blogging!

breckenridge snapshot.

Back at the beginning of March, our friends Alex & Ashley were kind enough to invite us to come stay with them in Breckenridge, Colorado. Neither Justin nor I had ever been there before [or snow skiing!], so we were more than happy to make the trek west for a change of scenery. [And these photos are a huge change of scenery from yesterday's beachy post!] 

justin was already in colorado for our friend blaine's bachelor party, 

so my trip over to meet him was a solo one; i enjoyed reading the cuckoo's calling.

upon arrival in denver, i was famished. we stopped at a little restaurant called 

smokin' yard's BBQ, in idaho springs, on the way to breckenridge.

the view from our table at smokin' yard's. i loved being in the "real" mountains.

try as i did, i couldn't adequately capture the beautiful views we experienced on the drive 

from denver to breckenridge. the mountains were steamy & foggy & stately.

massive icicles clung to the roof of the pretty house where we stayed.

justin was much better at skiing than i was; here you see him holding both our sets of skis.

riding in the gondolas was one of my favorite experiences. yes, i was a total newbie.

at lunch with everyone.

at another favorite restaurant of the trip, the lost cajun. a little piece of louisiana in colorado. 

my beloved pinecone necklace that justin picked up for me from one of the shops.

Though I turned out to be a rather sub-par skier [and that's being kind], I am already looking forward to planning our next ski trip. Maybe next time, we'll venture over to Utah! Have you ever been there? What are some places we can't miss? A big thank-you to Alex & Ashley for inviting us to come experience Breckenridge with them! We had a wonderful time.

[Photos: March in Breckenridge, Colorado | iPhone 5C]

around here lately: #benscoterlovestory.

to see more, check out #benscoterlovestory on instagram!

lindsey's getting married!

Happy Wedding Day to my dear friends, Lindsey Hudson & Justin Tison! May today be a day when time can slow down a little bit, so we can all take snapshots in our mind of this exciting occasion.

 

lindsey's engaged | engagement party | bachelorette party

 

see all hudson-tison wedding posts here

 

friday's fancies #70: wedding prep.

tote | top | ihome | shorts

 

Today is a day of festivities: Lindsey's wedding weekend* has finally arrived! On the one hand, I feel like I've been waiting for this weekend for years, & on the other hand, I can't believe it's actually arrived. Since this morning is the Bridesmaids' Luncheon, & the Rehearsal & Rehearsal Dinner is tonight, I obviously wouldn't be thinking of wearing the above. And if I did... well, that might be a little bit awkward. I've centered this week's Friday's Fancies look around getting ready for the main event: the wedding day! The theme this week is stripes, so that Michael Kors tote presented itself in all its glory, & I couldn't say no. If I owned it, I'd pack it to the brim with necessities & call it a day.

 

I'm so excited for Lindsey & Tison's big day. Let the party begin!

this week's posts:
roadtrippin' to jackson
family heirlooms
the sunday currently
a public apology to life itself
one of my first draft posts
what i want to blog about
the girlies

*wanna see what we did for her bachelorette party? go here.

 

linked up for friday's fancies on {long distance loving} 

 

the sunday currently, volume 33.

Greetings from the road back to Shreveport! By the time you're reading this, I'll either be on the road or about to be, headed back from Lindsey's bachelorette festivities in The Big Easy. That's New Orleans, folks.

By now, I'm sure we've all enjoyed delicious Southern Louisiana food, drinks, laughs, & music at Jazz Fest to our hearts' content. And now we're trekking it back north to the mother ship. And when I get there, I'm willing to bet I'll be ready to laze around & recover, preparing for a week of solid productivity!

reading two books, because I couldn't wait to start The Kite Runner, even though I'm still very slowly chugging along at Little Women. All in good time, folks. All in good time.

writing a lot of emails lately, getting things in order to return to school.

listening to a LOT of Mates of State recently. And the Mates of State Pandora station? Pure gold.

thinking that I'm getting really excited about all the upcoming events. Now that we're past Lindsey's bachelorette party, that means her wedding is RIGHT around the corner. And there's Kelsey's graduation. And Mother's Day. And a little trek to Dallas is probably happening soon. And, after all the festivities, I'll finally get to see Justin again, back in Wilmington.

smelling tons of perfumes lately, searching for a new signature scent. I'm always on the lookout - or smellout? - for a new favorite. I'm going to have to dive back into Warm & Cozy from Victoria's Secret soon. I've been thinking about that scent a lot lately.

wishing Justin could be in Shreveport with me. It's so strange to be away from him for so long, after being in the same place for almost half a year.

hoping my diet & exercise regimen can bounce back fast after the onslaught of delicious food I've been experiencing down South.

wearing my grandpa's watch lately. It's very special to me.

loving my family & friends for being so excited that I'm home. I've been having such a great time, & there are still more people I want to see before I head back to Wilmington. Also loving Justin for the frequent phone calls & texts, so we don't feel quite so far apart.

wanting a tall glass of water & a nap, I'm sure.

needing to get home quickly today, so that I can see my sister! She's back in town from college for the summer, & I'm so excited to hang out with her this week.

feeling like the idea to darken my hair up a little bit was a good one - I wanted my hair to be a little richer & warmer, & that's exactly what happened.

clicking PostSecret when I get home. I've forgotten to read the secrets for the past couple of weeks, & I hate that! I'll also be clicking though all of my favorite blogs this evening. I need to catch up!

photo: my sweet little lindsey, at our coffee date at rhino this past week \ instagram

friday's fancies #68: a southern bachelorette weekend.

Today we shove off for my dear friend Lindsey's bachelorette party! While we won't be spending time in the French Quarter pictured above - we'll be celebrating in its Louisiana namesake - I know there are lots of laughs & adventure in store for us. Below is what I'd be rocking, budgets aside. And even though my dream outfit isn't in the cards for this weekend's festivities, I have a little black dress in my suitcase that I know won't disappoint.

top | skirt | earrings | clutch | heels

Here's to a weekend full of laughs, drinks, friends, food, & music. Happy Bachelorette Party, Lindsey!

link-up: friday's fancies \ {long distance loving}

photo: taken in charleston, south carolina \ nikon

weekender.

This weekend, my dear friend Jordan is driving from Dallas to visit me. I cannot wait to spend some time with her. Other items on the docket include wrapping up a story I'm writing for a local magazine, shopping with my mom, going to church, & just relaxing in general. My time in Shreveport so far has been extra sweet, & I'm really enjoying it.

Now, for a few little tidbits I've been perusing as of late, that I think you may just enjoy.

-- As you may have read here, I'm going to be blogging every day in May. Interested in the deets? Check out Jenni's post. She has come up with post prompts, & I think they will make for some very interesting reading around the blogosphere.

-- I really enjoyed Joelle's Get It Done post, & while I haven't checked out all the websites & apps she mentioned, I have plans to see what they're all about in the near future. I'm ever on the hunt for things to make me more productive, & her post was pure gold in that respect.

-- If you're ever in the Shreveport area, allow me to suggest you take a visit to Twine. Today was one of Justin's best friend's birthdays, & I took him over there for a little lunch date. The food was simple & yummy, & the atmosphere was cozy & delightful.

-- My mom recently introduced me to Essie's Angora Cardi nail polish, & I was finally able to paint a coat on my nails today. I absolutely LOVE the color. I feel like it would work in any season, & right now it's giving me a sophisticated, understated pop of purple for Spring. Plus, it seems to straddle membership in the muddy, grey-infused family, as well as the classic reds. Win-win.

-- New Beauty Guru Alert! This girl is by no means new on the scene, but she is new to me, & I'm really enjoying her videos. It appears that she has a lot of material on drug store beauty products, which I'm excited to watch this weekend.

this week's posts:
neon novice
the sunday currently
around here lately
blogging every day in may

Here's to a relaxing, fun-filled weekend! My blogging rhythm will return to normal on Sunday, with a weekly installment of The Sunday Currently. Be sure to come link up & tell us all what you're up to.

next week: our wedding through the focused linz.

next week, i am absolutely thrilled to share with everyone some photos that my dear friend, lindsey, snapped during our wedding weekend, along with details from the festivities.

i talked a little bit about lindsey & how we got to know one another here, but that post doesn't really do our friendship justice. lindsey is just one of those extraordinary friends who always makes me laugh, always makes me want to go on an adventure, & always makes me want the most out of my life. i miss working with/living in the same city as this girl every day, & i hope that sentiment is communicated through my many random text messages, comprised mostly of weirdness & 'you have to listen to this' music suggestions. i think it is.

not only is lindsey one of the friendliest, most fun, well-dressed people i've ever met, she also has many talents, one of them being photography. and while she captured our celebration in both this post & this post, i still wanted to share some of my favorites over here in my little corner of the internet. not to mention, she also has a little wedding of her own coming up, & to say i can't wait for all the festivities is the understatement of the century.

i'll soon be sharing more when i post the photos from our photographer, shana burke. those posts will be coming in the next couple of months. it's harder than i thought it would be, to write about my wedding day. so much anticipation & emotion went into that day, it's difficult to find adequate words to describe it, but i'm going to try. the accompanying honeymoon posts have proven difficult to put into words as well, but they are coming along. i can't wait to share!

photo: a favorite from the day \ iphone

laura's engaged!

on a rainy, early morning - around five-thirty a.m. - justin & i drove over to the airport to take one of the earliest flights out of town. we were bound for shreveport, but our flights only took us as far as dallas. after a quick road trip with landon, jennifer, leigha, & layton, justin's mom picked us up & took us to pick up our moving truck. then, it was right on over to the storage unit, where dad, ward, & brian met us to move the rest of our furniture. thennnn, it was quickly on to our respective houses to get ready for the surprise engagement depicted [somewhat blurily] below.

following the festivities, we ate taco bell, got some sleep, then woke early. after breakfast at another broken egg with ward & rachel, we hit the road in our moving truck for our two-day trip to wilmington, which i'll soon re-cap here.

it was such a whirlwind, quick trip, but seeing one of my best & oldest friends get engaged was worth it! 

photos: laura + jonathan's engagement \ iphone