so that's what i'll do.

into New Bern

"No One's Gonna Love You" by Band of Horses is playing and we are sitting in Coffee Shack reading and writing and emailing. 

I keep having that out-of-body feeling, even when I'm talking to R or D, like I'm floating above myself, watching us interacting. Sometimes this feeling happens when I start to realize how fleeting these moments really are. It's as if it's my body's way of telling me, this won't last forever, so here's what it will feel like when it's a memory.

I've always known that this wouldn't last forever. We're given two years of classes together, and then we have six months of being in the field, preparing for when we are actually part of our profession. And during those six months, we might be in the same place, but we might not. 

It's hard to imagine what life will be like after we graduate. I've grown so comfortable in my rhythm here, in the patterns of studying and talking-instead-of-studying and running races and doing projects and sitting together in class. It's become home to me, and I know it will be hard when everything shifts, like I know that it will.

All I can do is soak in the moments of the next eight months. All I can do is attend as many gatherings as I can. Participate in as many service opportunities as possible. Meet up for coffee as much as my schedule allows. 

So that's what I'll do.

--

siddathornton through the years:

2012