the unmentionables. nope, not underwear.

According to Jenni's blog, today is supposed to be the day I tell you all of the things I'm most afraid of. And, well, here's the funny thing about that: I am scared to say the things I'm scared of, because of some irrational fear that if I say them - or write them - they will come true. Can this count as the thing I'm most afraid of, so we can just move on from this post into happier territory?

 

No? Ok, well, here we go...

 

I am afraid of snakes. Like, deathly afraid. Something about them FREAKS.ME.OUT. One time, I was watching one of those Jackass movies, & Bam Margera is really afraid of snakes, & they pranked him by throwing him into a pit of them. And he was really mad about it for a while, but he stayed friends with the guys who did that to him. If someone ever did that to me, I would consider it grounds to terminate the friendship. And I'm not kidding.

 

I am afraid of flying. I have yet to tell her yet, but when I read Nadine's expose' of her fear, I was relieved, because it's the closest thing I've ever read, to what I feel when I have to fly. My fear has gotten a little bit better, but I still experience major anxiety when I have to get on an airplane.

 

I am afraid of elevators. The doors closing on me. Being stuck on one. Having one open between two floors. Being trapped with a creeper on one, all by myself. The lights going out while I'm on one. Having one get to the bottom floor and bounce. Almost all of these fears have some rational [well, kinda] explanation. The elevators at a place I used to work, used to get stuck. Frequently. And one time, a person was trapped in there, helpless, for a really long time. The elevators in some of the high rise dorm rooms at Tech would open between two floors, & they would bounce at the bottom floor. The amount that I would not have been okay with an elevator bouncing with me inside it is not even express-able in words. And one time at Tech, I was in the library by myself, really late. I got into the elevator by myself, pushed a button that I thought was the correct one, then looked on in horror as the doors opened, a wrought iron gate separating me from the complete darkness of the floor to which I had just arrived. My fear of being trapped inside with a creeper? I think this came from a dream I once had when I was little, when I was trapped in an elevator with an Egyptian mummy. This stuff can't be made up, folks.

 

I am afraid of skeleton buildings. What's a skeleton building, you ask? Well, it's a building that is being built, but has yet to undergo that process in which they acquire walls, which means you can see right through it. This most frequently happens at the beach, where large condominiums are being built. And I don't like it.

 

I am afraid of deep water. Especially deep lake water. You never know what could be lurking in the depths: cars, tires, scary creatures, & other unmentionables. If you know what I mean. I'm even afraid of deep water in pools. I wish I was kidding, because I love swimming. As long as there is another person in the pool with me.

 

Ok, I think that's enough for today, don't you? There is a lot more where that came from, but just reference the first paragraph of this post, & you'll know why this is going to be the end of today's lesson.

 

What are you afraid of? Go make us all feel better by sharing on Jenni's blog. Misery loves company.

photo: how i feel about sharing things i'm scared of \ iphone